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Poem: Spiritual Queen, not Musical Theater Diva Grande Alcoholica May 4, 2010

Posted by frostwolftfirerose in Mystical, Personal Journey, Poem-A-Day, Uncategorized.
Tags: , ,

Once upon the time.
That time before. Many years.
Enamored of this place.
For so long, I felt my future
would certainly begin here.

And it did, but not in the way
I thought it might.  Tchotchkes
of fame, to roll in green stuff?
Heh! No such luck.  But heart
matters directed me first

in this walled-up fortress,
this truculent warrior place
deploying Turns Rose, and Don’t
Cry for Me Argentina Twists
Despite them.  And TO spite them.

This is their town, army of wraiths
ye also rans jealous for crumbs
of recognition, forcing themselves
onstage vainly trying to make
us be entertained with their cruelty.

At some point, I left Carrie
Bradshaw to wallow in her hell.
It’s the appropriate thing to do–
let the City that Cannot Sleep
have its Dignified Bottom.

So, cleared out, fated it seems
in retrospect.  Having come up
with job and apartment both that
day in late August.  The Troy boyfriend
having hooked me in, allied

as Jody is to the Hudson,
to this undiscovered emerald
nestled in a river valley
filled with trees, art and quiet beauty.
But also there are its cities too.

I woke up to Spring’s gorgeousness
in New York City, communed with Park
Tompkins trees, with the four directions
and elements, and an awareness
of the oh-so-many other worlds.

Gratitude for bazillion AA meetings
overflows this spacious core.
Yet enough yielded to enough. Fame
bug long departed for graveyard
where Oya blew its ashes into beyond.

A visit here, to escort a friend
clutching on to a tenuous freedom
from Evil White Powders sanctioned SAD*
this grand opportunity
to reconnect with that time.

Somehow I’m blessed with letting go
of that Jonesish clutching after
recognition and acknowledgment.
Your approval?  Well, nice and all.
Needed not.  My breaths and God connection

Have strengthened me thank you much.
I don’t write for fame now, just joy
and expansiveness conduct stanzas 
and energize the stage speeches.
I want to share this heart’s contents.

Whatever arises from that? Accidents
to be sure.  Sometiems happy, terrors
at other times.  They are points besides.
Sitting at this table, this cafeteria —
This timeless joy of breath–Enough!

*SAD – Standard American Diet



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